i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
