First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
