god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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