More tranny stories later!
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Randomize