Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Randomize
