I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
