I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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