did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
the day after is always just damage control
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Randomize
