if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
