I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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