Your face is a jimmy john
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
