its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
