My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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