He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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