I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
