I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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