Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
