She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
