you guys were way drunker than both of me
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
