yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
