I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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