just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
