he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
