Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
