You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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