A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
