i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
