can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
