Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
