And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
