it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize
