you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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