I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
