I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize