It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
