The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
