You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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