apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize