he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
