At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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