According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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