i think i have herpe
just one?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
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