found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
