everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
