Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
if only i could text you this smell
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
