Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize