he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
