I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
