Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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