craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
