so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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