yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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