yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
the day after is always just damage control
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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