just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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